I long for you...

Sleep is such a difficult thing to find these days.  My once stimulating dreams have turned into a constant battle and these past few nights have been a struggle.  Sigh.

Countless hours...minutes...seconds...just getting lost...flying by.  Reaching out for the security of sweet dreams only to be  awaken by some unseen resistance. 

As I lay here my mind searches. Theres so much! Just so much to take care of. I used to depend on you.  Now everyone seems to be depending on me.  Everyone wants my time but no one seems to give me theirs.  Who do I turn to now?  Who will be there just to listen to me when I need to speak? Who will give me a hug and tell me everything will be ok? Who will help me find some sanity in a world of insanity?

I dont have time for my own problems. I'm too busy taking care of others. I'm not sure how I got here,  but I feel this undying need to escape so that I may be a little free-willed and responsibility-less. I need this.

Everything is changing. Gears are shifting.  I am not the same person I was just 5 seconds ago. My spirit is rebelling with each moment that passes. 

Just as I think I have found my sleep...a panic spreads over me.  I feel that same, heavy, cold presence over me.  Its cold form moves up my body and rests upon my chest. Pressing down. Squeezing the life out of me.  I awaken violently gasping for air.  When I am able to shake off that feeling of panic...I lay back down next to him as he sleeps peacefully and undisturbed.

Who do I have to watch over me? Who will chase off panic? 

Its 5 am. I am delirious.

I long for you....sleep...

You are Dark...

Ink Blot Test

Your Personality

You are… Dark

The things that you saw in the test cards were mostly dark things, which means you are a highly-intelligent and introspective person. You are known to be the perfectionist at work/school or among friends and always set really high standards for yourself and others, which sometimes might appear to others as being cold-hearted. You know you’re not like that, so what about lowering your standards a little bit and stop critiquing yourself that much? Others would be lucky to be as smart and deep as you are. When in doubt, try to focus on the positive side of things, even if this will be hard or seem superficial: trust us, practice makes perfect!